A marriage is an interesting thing. No matter how many years you’ve been dating, no matter how much you’re convinced that you know your significant other, moving in together as a married couple changes things.
Eccentricities rise to the surface, things that sometimes take you completely by surprise. The real fun starts as you look for ways to combine your idiosyncrasies and his quirks to create the most cohesive (and hopefully peaceful) existence possible. Marriage is a living, breathing organism that has to adapt to survive.
We probably had a few more
shocks revelations than if we’d lived together before marriage, but hey, life’s filled with surprises, right? Some surprises are just more…quirky…than others.
Delightful details BrightSide probably didn’t know about me before marriage:
- Much like the dogs, I shed hair everywhere. All over the bathroom floor would be a natural assumption but, seeing as my scalp doesn’t really care where I am when it releases a follicle, BrightSide’s just as likely to find my hair dancing across the kitchen floor or decorating the family room rug…
- Seeing as we’re both human beings you’d think there’d be a ton of things we could share, but nope. BrightSide’s soap breaks me out; I have to use the hypoallergenic, sensitive skin stuff. His shampoo and conditioner won’t do a thing for my crazy curls, and stealing my razor results in an irate “Hey!” from the shower. I think the one thing we can share is shaving cream (mostly because I don’t buy into the marketing behind the girl brand).
- My part of the bathroom is an unholy mess all of the time. This probably has a great deal to do with the ratio of his-to-her products in there. (And here’s where I reveal the amount of crazy in my life to all you loyal readers.) BrightSide steps out of the shower, dresses, brushes his teeth, and goes. I step out and the marathon begins: frizz serum and curling gel into hair, which I then let air dry while I tackle other tasks. Sure, I’ve got getting dressed and brushing my teeth like BS does, but add in make-up (twice as long if I’m doing “full” make-up) and jewelry and that’s another chunk of time gone. Then I finish blow drying my hair, add a frizz control finishing cremè, and give everything a shot of hairspray before heading on my way.
- Despite the fact that a) he’s a guy, and b) he couldn’t care less, nine times out of ten BrightSide gets solicited for shoe, clothes, or jewelry advice. (He’s been a very good sport about this.)
- I’m what some people might call messy; I prefer to describe myself as a bit cluttered. I don’t quite know how it happens, really. I’ll spend hours straightening up the house then go about living my life, and the next thing I know I look around and there are piles. Of stuff. Everywhere. Papers, mail that didn’t get sorted, a cup from the night before, pads and pens and the bag from Target I brought home last week. It drives BrightSide nuts, but no matter how hard I try things still seem to multiply when my back is turned.
And some surprises BrightSide sprung on me after we moved in together:
- Neat. Freak. A character trait that has brought about some super-fun clashes over the years. (See “cluttered” point above.)
- It turns out that simply the smell of a few foods BrightSide adores makes me nauseated. Literally. Turnip greens, for example. I haven’t made these a single time for him since we got married, poor deprived soul, because their very odor is enough to make my stomach turn. I have the same reaction to Dinty Moore beef stew. Seriously, even finding the can sitting next to the sink for recycling is enough to trigger my gag reflex.
- An unusual tendency to forget to write items on the shopping list (which I thought was odd, considering the neat freak aspect). I do the heavy lifting on household groceries – get to the store once a week, buy everything we need, bring it home, and put it away. But I’m not a mind reader. Not on the list? Not in the cart. This is one of those quirks that we managed to work out after, well, a number of years. Better late than never, right?
I guess that’s one of the reasons they put that whole “for better or worse” line in the vows. Because intolerable messes can sometimes be BrightSide’s reality, much as disgusting food smells can be mine, but that’s when you dig down and weather the differences.
It’s the quirks that keep life from becoming painfully boring, after all.