Precursor:  For the folks who’ve made training suggestions for our darling Gracie, many thanks.  She is stubborn, we don’t live in a bubble, and (to be entirely fair) I haven’t really put the full force of my own pigheadedness behind this endeavor.  I’m not giving up.   


Our updated Gracie tally:

*  A Capri Sun, delicately carried so as not to puncture the package, dropped directly at my feet with a sheepish look.

*  Half a mechanical pencil.  (Full disclosure: this has happened more than once but no more than three times.)

*  An entire wooden #2 pencil.  (Gracie very helpfully left remnants on the carpet as evidence.)

*  On one appalling occasion Gracie appeared in the family room carrying an empty Imodium box.  (More distressing was the fact that a pill pack was nowhere to be found and I couldn’t FOR THE LIFE OF ME remember if medicine had been in that box.  Based on the days following this incident I’m relieved to say we dodged a bullet on that one.)

*  Repeatedly steals the fireplace rocks  She hasn’t managed to eat one yet, though the sound of canine teeth crunching stone is like nails on a chalkboard to me.

*  All of the leftovers from a local diner’s country fried chicken with gravy.  Gracie took that box right off the counter and licked it clean, nibbling slightly on the corners of the styrofoam container so as to get every last morsel of deliciousness.

*  The demise of BrightSide’s glasses.  Frames gnawed out of shape and one lens completely gone.  Now THAT was an expensive snack…

*  The last of my surprise pack of M&Ms (read: congratulations, you survived the day, have some chocolate) from BrightSide along with half a Ziplock bag, the contents of which remain a mystery.

*  In an especially heartbreaking move, Gracie stole the leftover garlic breadstick twists my friend had made us.  Bear was definitely not pleased.

*  And, in a lightning fast strike during breakfast this week, a still frozen chocolate chip waffle from T-man’s plate.

There are no words.