Missing Letter Monday: no X

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Excellent!  One of the hardest letters to use in Scrabble, so finally there’s an advantage to drawing the X.  Today’s challenge is brought to you by The Mad Grad Student’s Missing Letter Mondays.


My apologies ahead of time if you love someone with this particular inclination but I am seriously at a loss so…

Mustaches.  I mean, what the hell are those about?

Ladies (and gentlemen), I understand everyone’s got their own particular jam and I’m all about whatever floats your boat, but I’ve never once looked at a fella sporting a ‘stache and thought to myself omg omg omg, he’s looking my way, just look at that ‘stache, HE’S SO HOT.

Just…no.

I find mustaches oddly distracting.  Like a train wreck I can’t look away from, I struggle to concentrate on whatever the gentleman might be saying but fail miserably because all I can see is upper lip hair wiggling with every syllable.  Which means suddenly I’m Charlie Brown and ‘stache man is the teacher.  He could be sharing the secrets of the universe, but all I’m hearing is wah wah wah wah.

Then there’s that inevitable pause because I’ve been asked a question but have absolutely no idea what it was because, again, ‘stache.

It’s not even like this is a quality issue.  There’s no such thing as a “good” mustache to me – bushy, trimmed, skinny, handlebar – no matter the style or lack thereof, I simply can’t stop myself from wondering what on earth would possess a man to grow hair there.

I mean, it takes effort.  Not actually growing the hair per se, but shaping and maintaining a mustache takes time out of a guy’s day.  Time he could spend on, say, cutting toenails or trimming nose hair.  (Just sayin’.)

I won’t bother with the crumb trap argument since it’s not like the rest of us don’t end up with ketchup on our face from time to time.  A mustache does seem to increase the likelihood of general food messiness, though, so you’ve gotta wonder why someone would open up that can of worms…

Or maybe they’re just better at eating neatly.  In which case more power to them but still.

To ‘stache or not to ‘stache, that is the question.  I kind of thought it was a no brainer, but considering how many mustaches I see floating around out there it’s clearly up for more of a debate than I thought.

Regardless, this was my random I-just-don’t-get-it babbling for the day.  Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

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