I’m way past the Elmo years. (Thank you sweet Jesus that my kids were past the Elmo years before Elmo became the ruler of all things preschool because I truly believe it would have led to me stabbing myself in the eye with a fork.) So I can really only attribute stumbling across this post as some sort of divine intervention. A force that stepped in so that I would discover this blog (“My Least Favorite Child Today”?!? Bwahahahaha!!!) and its ridiculously funny author.
You probably ought to pee before you read this one. Unless you have a personal attachment to Elmo. Then you probably ought to skip it. And maybe do some reflection on why you’re not driven insane by his voice alone.
(ps – Don’t skip the Least Favorite Child Results tally at the end. This guy might be my new hero!)
“I’m not going to wait until their ten or eleven years old to sit them down and have the ‘talk.’ I’m not going to ignore the situation entirely and hope that they figure it out on their own either. They might only be 14 months old but they need to know the truth. Sesame Street’s Elmo is a douchebag.”