…okay, this isn’t really working out.  Maybe it’s time to adjust my expectations.

I have a stubborn streak a mile wide, one that serves me well when it comes to not giving up just because I hit a few stumbling blocks along the way.  It’s what made me push through that semester in college when I had mono, and it’s how I survived more than one year as a public school teacher.  That stubborn streak forces me to put my head down and barrel through until I come out the other side (or at least hit a cruising altitude).

But what to do when the ride is more than a little bumpy and there’s no end in sight?

One of my weak areas is long term goals, which is just a wee bit ironic since BrightSide is the king of long term planning.  Sometimes I absolutely befuddle him with my lack of direction.

But when I do settle on a project – a goal or venture for myself – then the fire’s been lit.  I’m off and running, end result in sight, and checking things off my list as I go.

Except sometimes I find this project, through nobody’s fault, sort of stalls out.  Life interferes, or once I got into the middle of it I found that I wasn’t pointed in the right direction anymore.  For whatever reason, I hit the wall.  A really big wall.  The kind of wall you can’t walk around or scale.

In the past this would have meant Capital F Failure.  The goal no longer fits my life?  Well, that’s not an option, it’s a goal for Pete’s sake.  But now I’m starting to understand the grace required to shift gears mid-stride.

I’m beginning to understand that I can only see my true potential when I let go of old expectations, and what a blessing that is.


My post as part of Colline’s Gratitude Project.