You know, there’s a lot of alternative treatments out there. Acupressure. Biofeedback. Reiki. We might as well crowdsource this stuff. Check out I’m Sick and So Are You for the lowdown on float therapy.

“You may be asking yourself, what is float therapy and why is this chick’s husband making her do it?

Well, A.) Float therapy is, um, I don’t know how to clinically describe it. You’re in a pod thing. It’s filled with super salty water. You can shut the top so there’s no sound or light. It’s like they put a tiny saltwater pool in the back of a Honda hatchback, but way cleaner and more 2001: A Space Odyssey. You know, I’m really not selling this, am I? Google it. Or ask Steph Curry because, according to my husband, this is all Steph Curry does. He wins sports games of some sort, I have no idea which sport because I have no idea who Steph Curry is. He wins sports games and floats. 24/7. That’s all he does.

And, B.) I don’t know why my husband did this. We’ve been married for almost 25 years. I think he’s just running out of gift ideas. Or maybe he thinks I want to be better at sports.”

I Tried Float Therapy So You Don’t Have To: I’m Sick and So Are You