I’ve entered a knock-on-wood phase as in hey, great news, I only had to take two doses today, knock-on-wood. I’m betting large on the protective power of wood knocking here because after a week of staggering through life it’s time to get back in the game. There are no sick days built into my healthcare plan.

That being said, here are the latest observations du jour.

1.  Phoebe will literally sit at BrightSide’s feet and gaze longingly at him as she waits for…something. He asks if she wants to go out – she walks away. He invites her up on his lap – she blinks, then walks away. About twenty minutes later we stumbled onto the answer. She was waiting for me to ask if she needed to go out. Seriously. This dog.

2.  Taking Gracie into someone else’s home brings flashbacks of days spent chasing our toddlers around friends’ houses. Don’t touch that! That either! GIVE ME THAT!! Both outings involve slobbery items returned to their rightful owner and a sheepish acknowledgement that despite our best parenting efforts the critters were winning.

3.  Turning the house around for a showing in ninety minutes or less is a legit cardio workout and should log on my exercise ring.

4.  It’s remarkable what I’ll find in a kid’s trash can after explicit instructions categorizing them as purely decorative in this particular stage. And that is all I have to say about that. Bless.

5.  Marketing a house shifts everything down to your diet. Meals involving fish, broccoli, greens, or anything curry go on the no no list when strangers might wander through with a perplexed what’s that smell?

6.  Everybody and their brother jumped on the Marie Kondo Netflix series before us but today I’m all oh, I GET IT NOW. Someone commented in an article that tidy people are in a state of constant tidying without even realizing it and I think that’s 100% true.

7.  I can be tidy.

7a.  I can.

7b.  No, really, I can.

7c.  I just don’t know if I’ll ever be tidy without realizing it.

8.  Anyone else shocked the shutdown is rocking the thirty day count? I vacillate between wtf and WHAT IN THE EVERLOVING F*** daily. And the sight of families lined up outside food banks because they’re hitting critical status is heartbreaking.

9.  I miss when the grownups were in charge.

10.  So here’s my obligatory mention that yes, it’s my birthday, I’ve survived another year. Woo hoo! Tune in tomorrow for what being 47 taught me.