1. The out of town ball game we had tickets to for last Saturday got moved to Sunday. And it couldn’t have been lunchtime on Sunday, oh no siree. They rescheduled it for four o’clock which meant not getting back until after ten heading into a seriously intense week. Because of course they did.
2. Like that wasn’t enough of a wrench in our plans, T-man popped a fever on Saturday afternoon. He usually runs low so when that thermometer started inching towards 101° things took an unpleasant turn. But it’s like I always say: no road trip’s complete without stopping for an emergency stash of DayQuil™.
3. Crunch time clothes shopping for a holiday event outfit is not my favorite thing. Crunch time clothes shopping during the Christmas season insanity dances dangerously close to Dante’s 8th circle of hell.
4. In my brilliance I decided I’d do all my family dinner shopping in one fell swoop. One hardcore grocery store attack that would last as long as it lasted until the job was d-o-n-e. It seemed a solid plan until I realized my shopping list was about fifty items long and required a number of double backs to find something I forgot. That’s two hours of my life I’ll never get back.
5. Ten minutes of that was a particularly fun mission hunting for the specific snack I’d promised Bear I’d bring home. I finally swallowed my pride and asked for directions only to have an employee tell me they didn’t carry those chips because oh my lord, of course they don’t.
6. There was a reception I wanted to go to Friday night – shocking, I know, yet true. But it turns out one of the crappy things about being a grownup is sometimes you’re physically incapable of being where you want to be. Like literally incapable due to the laws of physics and other science-y stuff. Once someone figures out a way for me to be one hour away at the girl’s basketball game then ferry her to a friend’s holiday party while simultaneously being at my own thing I’ll be good to go.
7. When your kid’s got to be somewhere at 6:30pm on Saturday so you make dinner reservations for 5:00 except 6:00 rolls around and the food is nowhere to be seen. NOWHERE. I mean, are you kidding me? It has to be this hard? REALLY?!
8. Oh, and when you’re trying to get to that 5:00 reservation on time except everything’s all jumbled up and you’re the one who has to let the dogs back in but they’re covered in mud so you’re wiping down their paws when you realize you’ve just gotten mud on the sleeve of your white sweater that it took four sweater purchases and two returns to find. Bless it all.
9. I actually spotted a light out on our tree and pulled it so we could replace it except it turns out we can’t seem to get the teeny tiny bulb out of the casing and in the process of trying managed to break off the wires that bent outward so now the circuit’s incomplete and instead of having one tiny light out we have a whole section because of course we do.
10. There’s nothing quite like rain for three days straight before people are supposed to come over. Because exponentially increasing the odds that the dogs will streak across our light carpet with their muddy paws and bellies doesn’t add to my stress in any way. Nope.
Dang Laura. Can I get you some nog? I’ll rum it up real good.
We’re almost there. Hang in there!
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Oh, Joey, I did indeed need a nog several times this week. Unfortunately I’ve also caught a severe case of the cruds and have been on way too much cold medicine to even consider rumming it up. Hopefully I’ll kick it by the end of the weekend and can join you then!
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I was sick last Christmas. It was rotten. I sure hope you’re well soon, able to breathe and rum with ease 🙂
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Thank you, I’m tiptoeing toward wellness, fingers crossed I haven’t jinxed it. There’s something about germs at the holidays that feels downright offensive, isn’t there?
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Yes, because it cannot possibly be the most wonderful time of the year when we’re snotty and foggy and tired 😦
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Kudos for getting anything done. Next time, put an ornament in front of that bulb.
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Wise words, Dan. Wise words indeed.
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“If it’s not one thing it’s another. It’s always something.” Gilda Radner SNL 1972.
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True then and true now.
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It’s not the holidays, it’s one damn thing after another.
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Indeed it is.
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And yet you kept it together. Amazing!! I once stopped for breakfast at a national chain restaurant. They had ONE waiter (which should have clued me in to leave, but noooo. I’m stubborn that way). I asked him if it would be a problem, because he seemed overwhelmed and he kept assuring me the service would be FINE. An hour later still no food, although waiter guy kept stopping by to check on me. I had ordered scrambled eggs FFS. I finally told him I was leaving and that the large OJ I’d been sipping and had finished with no food in sight, was on him. He agreed and then said there was a large office party type thing being hosted there. And still they had only ONE WAITER. No tip for him….although he had my sympathies.
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Oh my, yes. I’ve been thinking today that we should have been a lot more up front & assertive about our timeline and how necessary it was to get out by a certain time. Lesson learned.
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Maybe you should postpone the holidays, have a glass of whatever suits you, go to bed and pull the covers over your head. Maybe a sign on the door “closed for renovation”.
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This is a brilliant suggestion, Carol.
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Very tough. 😱
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One foot in front of the other, though. 😉
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I agree. Step by step you can get through.
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The last two happened this weekend. I wrecked two lightbulbs trying to prise them out to the extent the all the lights stopped working. Then to find they don’t make that type of bulb anymore. And how can a dog get muddy paw prints half way up the living room wall.
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I know!! Ours splattered mud against the wall on the stairs coming up from the basement — I mean, c’mon! Thank goodness someone painted this house with that wipeable paint. 🙂
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Oy vey. I feel your pain.
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When it rains it pours, right?
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yes indeed
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