1. Bar hopping with my buddies ’til the room spins because with age comes wisdom.
2. Taking down Christmas decorations because surviving these 365 days earned me the night off.
3. Peeling, chopping, dicing, mincing, sautéing, simmering, measuring, or mixing because there’s enough leftovers to feed an army around this joint.
4. Running a marathon because I’m not trying to foil a terrorist plot before midnight.
5. Cleaning out my pit of a closet despite the fact that I’m scaling piles of stuff to get to my shoes because tomorrow is another day.
6. Eating turducken, Rocky Mountain oysters, or pigs feet. No judgement, you do you, but absolutely not because eww.
7. Learning to crochet doilies because I’m not eighty.
8. Giving the cat a bath because I’m not going down that road again.
9. Swearing off swearing because sometimes $%&@! is all I’ve got.
10. Swearing off chocolate, cashews, butter, coffee, caffeine, salt, cheese, sugar, creamer, guacamole, or foods that start with the letter S because come on, man, a girl’s gotta live.