1. Professional smuggler: The thought of swallowing anything that will later need to be – ahem – “collected” is absolutely not okay with me.
2. Deodorant tester: This isn’t the person who puts on the deodorant. It’s someone who sticks their nose in that person’s armpit and gives it a big old sniff for stinkiness. Yikes.
3. Snake milker: These guys extract venom from extremely poisonous snakes like rattlesnakes and cobras. ‘Nuff said.
4. Chicken sexer: I really can’t see myself wrestling newborn chicks so I can spy on their nether regions.
5. Pet food tester: Eat dog food? Yes, people really do this for a living. No, I can’t imagine I’d be a very good taste tester after I throw up in my mouth a little.
6. Diver: Not as exotic as #1-5 but the idea of spending my days strapped to an oxygen tank one hundred feet below the surface makes me freak.
7. Disney princess: Dress up in a floor length gown, hair coiffed and sprayed to kingdom come, grinning like Cruise Director Barbie for ten hours straight? Nope. Can’t do it.
8. Gum removal specialist: I’m not a fan of gum while it’s still wrapped in its pristine little wrapper, so I certainly don’t want to spend my days scraping away the germy wad you stuck under the table.
9. Stripper: I like food too much for this to work.
10. Hot yoga instructor: Where to begin. Flexibility. Tranquility while holding impossible positions. Plus passing out is bad form when you’re the instructor.
Hmm, nope for me on all those as well. The dog food especially. I fear cat food is worse. I hate the smell of wet cat food and sometimes have nightmares I have to eat it. *shudder*
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My kids could not stand when our kitty was eating small portions of wet food – their moaning was so annoying I finally just fed her myself so I wouldn’t have to listen to it. 😆
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HAHA! Ours eat behind a closed door, but sometimes it is my turn to open the can and plop. EWWWWW
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None of these appeal to me either. Another that I would not be quick to take up and that’s a bomb defuser. Just sayin’.
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Ooh, good one! The stress alone…then you factor in my sometimes shaky hands and that one would definitely shave some years off my life!
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😀
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Excellent list!! There are none on that list that I could do either, simply because of the *UGGGHHH* factor or because nobody will pay to see a gazillion year old woman take off her clothes…and those that will? I don’t want to know about them. *uggghh* 😛
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Everybody’s got their thing…sometimes it’s better not to know. 😉
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When I was a senior in college (forever ago) a bunch of us went to a career planning seminar. One of the guest lecturers talked about the best and worst careers. ‘Chicken sexer’ was listed as the worst. If the thought of what you’re doing isn’t bad enough, think about how long you’re doing it every day. This was back when “So, what do you do for a living?” was likely to come up in conversation in the dating scene.
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Well, it certainly would be a conversation starter at parties. Followed by merciless ribbing, no doubt, but at least you’d be memorable. 😆
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These all sound awful, each in their own special way. And, for my money, the only Disney princess worth discussing was Annette Funicello…
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There’s a whole squadron of them now! Even so, I can’t think of a single one I’d want to spend 100 degree days pretending to be.
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#9, please know that there are folks out there who would like to see those of us with, ahem, a few more curves, on a pole, shaking what our mamas gave us. Just saying…
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This Right Here is what gives me hope for America. Yep.
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so many jobs not to do, so little time
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Bwahahahaha!!!
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Is it too late for me to be a Disney Princess? A longer career than a snake miller.
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It’s never too late!
Well, that’s probably not true. I’d imagine they’re picky about fresh young faces when it comes to Cinderella and Snow White. 😉
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How clever to find ten such professions that won’t work! Never for me either. I wonder who does it.
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I wrote my snappy little title and stand by it, but these jobs are truly proof that there’s something for everyone. I couldn’t be a tandem jump instructor either but somebody makes a paycheck doing that, too. 😳
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Yes too right! It just goes to show how varied we humans are.
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