1.  If you ever wonder if when it rains it pours is real I can 100% assure you THAT IT IS.

2.  Something breaks unexpectedly and you think huh, that’s unfortunate but okay, get a replacement and move on.

3.  Then thing #2 goes POOF and you say this isn’t good, not at all, but it’s not like we can do without it so let’s roll.

4.  Suddenly a tree cracks and starts leaning precariously toward the house and it’s not like you can ignore that so there’s nothing else to do but pony up and call tree removal companies for estimates. Good times.

5.  That’s it, right? Bad things come in threes, this should be the end of it except that very thought challenges fate and fate takes the bait.

6.  Sure enough, the text comes in two days later: Mom, something’s wrong with my computer, it won’t turn on.

7.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

8.  Narrator: No, she wasn’t kidding me, the laptop was well and truly dead. The laptop she has to have for school. For Pete’s sake.

9.  We’ve had a nine(ish) day streak of surprise expenditures and I don’t know about you but that’ll strain anyone’s patience. In college it would have meant living on ramen but my anti-gluten self can’t even do that anymore.

10.  Just in case the very act of laying this madness out there puts the wheels in motion for disaster number I-don’t-even-know-what I’ve given my end table a nice rap or three. You can knock on wood for us, too, if you’re so inclined.