the things we do for love (AKA what the hell am I doing?)

You have to admit, crazy or not, we all do things for love.  We step way outside our comfort zone when we’re dating, and the more serious things get the more likely we are to do something strange in the name of amore.  Shoot, this nutty instinct still kicks in even after you’ve been together for years.

Sometimes the acts are big, sometimes they’re small…and sometimes they just seem downright bizarre.

‘Cuz, you know…love.

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grannies, hipsters, bikinis, and a g-string

BrightSide and I often joke about how men have it so easy when it comes to clothes.  There are only about eight basic levels of dress, from tore-up-scrappy to formal wear, whereas women juggle approximately 537 combinations when it comes to fashion choices.

If you want to use the conservative estimate, that is.

I thought I’d factored in all the variables, but recently a thought struck me like lightning out of a clear blue sky: I’d failed to take into account the skivvies.

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four and a half decades, gone in a flash

Well, son of a gun, guess who has a birthday today.

Both kids are wishing it was them ‘cuz, you know, presents, but no such luck…BrightSide won this particular lottery.  That’s right, 46 years ago today some doctor smacked my fella’s bottom so he’d take his first breath.  (Just kidding.  I don’t really know if they smack baby’s bottoms in delivery rooms anymore, but it made for funny imagery so let’s run with it.)

This is one of those moments that can slip sideways so easily.  What if BrightSide hadn’t been born in Virginia?  Would he still have ended up at UVA?  What if he focused on chess or chemistry or becoming an Olympic athlete?  Would we have found some other way to meet? Does this whole tapestry that’s become our lives begin in that delivery room?

Whoa, step back, mind spinning.

I guess I ought to send that doctor a thank you note for getting BrightSide safely into the world. I know my world sure wouldn’t be the same without him.

Everybody sing along now…

“You’re older than you’ve ever been.
And now you’re even older.
And now you’re even older.
And now you’re even older.

You’re older than you’ve ever been.
And now you’re even older.
And now you’re older still.”

Older – They Might Be Giants

Happy Birthday, BrightSide!


ps – My bad, but I blew it on remembering to get a separate birthday present.  Sorry!!  This is why December babies end up resenting their birthdays, I know, and here I am adding fuel to the fire.  I love you!

the 7 things (plus 9,000 more)

I know this looks like man bashing, and a week before Christmas, too.  Guess I’m rolling the dice on coal in my stocking this year.

But damn, y’all, this is funny.

(ps – BrightSide, you totally kick ass, too.)

“Husbands are clueless (gross generalization but I guarantee most of you are nodding your heads).  Not because they’re genuinely stupid or anything.  They’re just wired differently.  It would never occur to my husband to ask for a gift receipt, or to pick up my daughter’s skating costume, or to dress Holden in a decent shirt because it’s picture day.  It’s not his fault, really.  I’m pretty sure it’s a physiological difference between men and women.  But I end up doing like 99% of the shit around here (I’m totally exaggerating, it’s more like 95%) just because lots of stuff occurs to me that never even occurs to him.”

Ten things my hubby has no clue I do – Baby Sideburns

twice is crazy town

I’ve been pouring my heart and soul onto this blog for a while…ups and downs, highs and lows, everything from shining moments to face first in the dirt fiascos.  I’m sure it must be glaringly apparent by now that life has brought a healthy mix of miracle and madness my way.

So I doubt any of you will be surprised by my crazy cluster %#@! of a story today.

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How to detonate your evening in 3 easy steps.

I’m constantly amazed at the number of ways there are to send an evening down in flames, many of which can be accomplished in twenty minutes or less.

This isn’t getting stuck in your typical gee, this is pretty lame rut, staring at M.A.S.H. reruns while you eat tv dinners.  Nope.  We’re talking volcanic eruption, extinction level event meltdowns that leave children in tears and adults wondering what the hell just happened.  Arguments that go from zero to ninety in less than a minute.  Bizarre catastrophic clashes that end in slammed doors and intense sobs.

And that doesn’t even count my crazy.

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gratitude: it’s all in the timing

Hundreds of stars had to align so that I would meet BrightSide at exactly the right moment in my life.

My dad had to be stationed in Virginia during my high school years so UVA would even be on my radar.  I had to love Virginia enough to want to return for college, even though everyone around me was applying to New England schools.  BrightSide had lots of great Virginia schools to choose from, then he had to decide he’d rather attend UVA than play basketball for a smaller school.

We had to meet each other amidst 13,000+ undergraduate students.  Somehow we landed ourselves in the same public speaking class, but we were both involved in serious relationships at the time.  Meaning we both had to end up leaving those serious relationships and then somehow run into each other again.  At a school with over 13,000 people wandering around.  Yep.

Then, in the ultimate cosmic twist, BrightSide and I not only ran into each other at a party but we met again the very day that we’d split from those other relationships.

Now, who can argue with timing like that?

Fate, the universe, God’s master plan – whatever you choose to call it, the stars certainly aligned so the two of us met at exactly the right moment.  And my life has been all the better for it.


My post as part of Colline’s Gratitude Project.