I feel wrecked. Like my legs have been swept out from under me, dropping me to the ground in a crumpled heap and leaving me there like a rag doll. Calling it a good day simply means I can pick myself up again.
Breathing comes hard sometimes. A hitch that catches just a little too long…enough to remind me that my mom is actually gone now, a reminder that brings fresh tears and new pain. Well, not new. Just renewed.
I’m encouraged that I see interesting blogs to share – thoughts, stories, or perspectives that hold my often fragmented attention. At least there’s a spark there, a small part of me that sits up and takes notice when I read something beautiful and unique.
But how long will I hang in this limbo? It’s an odd space that squeezes my heart, making it ache, and stopping my words in their tracks.
I’m sure you already know the answers to all the questions you are asking yourself and the feelings of limbo you are experiencing. It’s a terrible place to be and the answer to how long you’ll be there is different for everyone. You can’t rush the process. Losing a parent is a very strange feeling. Hold onto your Mom and she’ll help you find your way through the door.
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Thank you for your kind words, George. This is very insightful and definitely struck a chord with me.
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I don’t want to “like” this post, and there are never any right words for a time like this. Just know that I’m thinking of you and your family.
…the limits of the Internet unfortunately prohibit good old fashioned casserole at times like this.
Carry On, Warrior.
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Thank you. Your thoughts & virtual casserole are welcome here. (We Can Do Hard Things.)
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Laura, I’m so sorry for your pain. I wish I could give you a hug. Surrender is sometimes the most peaceful thing we can do, knowing that in time, we will move forward more easily. Your feelings of grief are natural and should be honored. Thinking of you. 💗xoxoxo
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Thank you, Tonya. I’m trying to accept this reality. Intellectually I know that will release the pain, but my heart is having a hard time. We’ll just take it day by day…
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Aw. You will never forget your mom, but the pain will lessen in time. My mother’s been gone for nearly 3 years now, but I still think of her every single day . I still wish that I could just hop in the car and go visit her just to chat, or to get away from the stress of my own life. I still think of her every time I have one of those special meals that she used to prepare for us as kids. And yes, it still hurts sometimes, but not as much as the fresh grief you’re experiencing now. I hate to spout clichés, but it will get better with time. Hugs to you.
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Thanks for the kind words. I tell myself that others make it through this — it’s just hard to see the other side from here. I appreciate the encouragement.
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It really does take time. Allow the grief, it can be healing. Wishing you the best. 💕
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Thank you. It’s hard to sit with this grief, but I know it will be better in time.
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