This too shall pass.
The phrase passed from generation to generation, words meant to soothe souls and convince adults that they will indeed survive parenthood without killing their offspring.
It’s used to dull the pain of countless nerve stripping phases of your brood. The screaming-through-the-night phase. The unending-diaper-changing years. The YOU-CAN’T-MAKE-ME, foot-stomping chapter.
But-everybody-else-has-it…If-you-loved-me…What’s-wrong-with-$120-sneakers?…Who-cares-that-it’s-30-degrees-I’m-fine-in-shorts…
One simple phrase intended to keep us from tearing our hair out or running wild in the streets. So far, so good.
Bear and I have struggled our way through a good number of “This too shall pass” stages. Now that she and I are roughly the same size it’s moved into the delightful area of wardrobe.
I should point out I’m not great at sharing. (I’m actually just beating BrightSide to the punch since he likes to mention it when I talk about the clothes and shoes thing.) It’s true, though – Bee and I were too far apart in age to borrow each other’s clothes, and I never really had a gal pal like that growing up. So for better or worse, my closet has always been my own.
Which means it’s been a bit of a stretch to have my ten-year-old daughter asking to borrow, well, everything.
It started out with my clothes, but that was easy to deflect since they were all too big for her. Once Bear began wearing my shoe size the requests moved on to footwear. Heels, flats, boots, sandals – everything was fair game, and every no was a mini battle. Finally it came down to how expensive the shoes were. Nice shoes were a no go, but I’d at least let her try on the inexpensive ones. I have to admit that her wide feet worked to my advantage there.
And now here we are. Bear’s practically looking me in the eye, and she considers my clothes fair game when it comes to begging and pleading. Unfortunately (for her), she hasn’t established the best track record when it comes to the concept of borrowing and returning items.
Shoes have gone missing for weeks while I pestered her for their return. Sweaters have ended up crumpled at the bottom of her hamper, left to fester until Bear finally remembered to bring the basket to the laundry room. Loaning the items is a leap of faith; harassing my daughter for their return is exhausting.
But like my pal Big D reminded me, this too shall pass.
I share a bit of the clothes. ON OCCASION. My main complaint is yours, these items are seldom returned to me! I scream about it, I do. I will tear a room apart to find my black leggins, which come to think of it, “What the hell happened to the ones I bought you?! They can’t all be yours!” lol
Tank tops are the most argued over.
Shoes are a no go. I have skinny feet and after Sassy wears them, they look like canoes. Moo cannot fit mine yet.
Costume jewelry and scarves are fluid here, though.
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See, I could probably live with it if it was on occasion, but once I give her a yes she ALWAYS expects a yes. And then if I say no it’s because I’m mean, awful, terrible mom who *never* buys her the things she needs and *always* says no when she’s *never* done anything but take care (ha!) of my things. lawd.
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Indeed. *sigh* Teenagers.
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isn’t it fun having pre-teens???
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Oh yeah. Super Duper Fun. All the days.
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Ah, the struggle is real… and it is a universal struggle between mothers and daughters! 😉
http://positivelyunbroken.com/2016/03/14/cleaning-the-closet/
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Oh my gosh, that is TOO FUNNY. I don’t think it’s occurred to Bear to try your daughter’s move because she knows I’d react super poorly to my clothing being “liberated” from my closet! You score extra points on the patient mama factor!
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i ‘survived’ raising three daughters, i know your pain –
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We all come out the other side, right??
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Oh wow … I hadn’t even considered that phase in my future. I’m going to tell them my stuff is very unfashionable … maybe that will work. I also hate sharing. lol
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Hubby tells me it’s a compliment that she thinks they’re worth borrowing. I’m not a particularly fashionable girl so I can’t imagine what the appeal is, but there you go. 😉
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