I had a pretty slammin’ headache on Monday — we’re talking sledgehammer-sized pounding with the crushing weight of a Mack truck — so I did something I never do. Literally, never.
I drove to the store with the radio off.
You’re probably thinking, “Wow, earth shattering life event. What’s the big deal?”
Well, that would be because you’ve never lived inside my head.
(Side note: wouldn’t it be fun if we could swap brains with someone for a day? For example, I could see what it feels like to be completely chill and logical like BrightSide, and he could experience what it feels like to have your thoughts sprint around like a coked-up hamster whose wheel is on fire.)
Things are really busy in there. ALL the time. I used to be more concerned about this, but I’ve talked with other women who say their brains work the same way…so now I’m wondering if it’s a whole gender-based, multi-tasking, genetic-level thing going on.
Or maybe my brain is just out to drive me nuts. Who knows.
So for kicks, I thought it might be fun to share 15 minutes of my Monday with all of you. Enjoy.
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(Leaving home for the grocery store despite raging headache and intense overall crappiness, because there’s no guarantee I’ll feel better tomorrow and we need to resupply.)
My favorite morning show has some competition going on that’s totally boring — sports stats? who can guess the amount of (some item I don’t care enough to remember)? — Whatever. Flip.
Commercial. Commercial. Crappy song I’ve heard a thousand times that makes me want to punch the steering wheel, and not in a “this is my JAM!” kind of way.
NPR. I usually like this one a lot, but my head is pounding too hard to process what the man with the thick accent is trying to discuss, and it sounds like it’s about foreign policy or strained relations in another country. There’s no thumping bass but my brain can’t convert the incoming information into something meaningful. It’s all gibberish this morning.
Commercial. Back to original station — boring competition has been replaced by (of course) a commercial.
Aaaarrrgghh. (Hit power button and silence descends on car.)
Stunned moment during which I think am I actually going to drive in SILENCE? Yes. Yes, I am. But I already know it will be far from silent. Let the thought onslaught begin:
~ Yesterday was really intense. I shouldn’t have waited so long to say something. I should have dealt with this a long time ago so things didn’t get so pent up.
~ I wish I’d learned how to fight growing up. Passive aggressive behavior doesn’t count and conflict freaks me out. How am I going to deal with this?
~ Man, being a grown-up sucks big time.
~ Spring Fling was supposed to be this Friday. I haven’t heard anything about it, though, so I guess it’s a no-go. Good thing for me: I’d volunteered to help, but this weekend knocked my feet out from under me, I can’t take another day of — holy crap, am I going fifty?! SLOW DOWN.
~ Do we have eggs? I think I was supposed to add eggs to the list. Where’s that pen, I can add them now…oh, never mind, I’ll get some eggs just in case. And creamer. Now what was the other thing we needed for —
~ Cool, look at all those hay rolls. (There’s probably an actual name for gigantic rolls of hay in a pasture but, y’know, me and my non-country roots.)
~ Bear did such an awesome job this weekend but I’m completely fried. The percussion group performance was so great — all the arts groups were good, but it would have been easier to enjoy them if I wasn’t surrounded by a posse of kids cutting up…I know they’re young, this is my own issue, but I really don’t care that you know all the words to this song. I’d like to hear the group on stage perform it. Thanks.
~ The church musical just about did me in. I can’t believe they actually pulled it off after all. The kids were amazing, but if I don’t stop singing those damn songs I’m going to lose my freaking mind. “There once was a man named NO-AH…” Ack, ack, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
~ Who decided that bowling would make a good end-of-year outing for the kids? And why did I agree to help chaperone? Did the girl who pushed all my buttons actually deserve the wrath that welled up inside me or was I just feeling like hell and took it out on a nine-year-old?
~ Geez, I feel like crap.
~ I wonder if it’s gonna rain again tomorrow. I could really use some sunshine.
~ So I’ll get the groceries done, get them home and put away, and keep going on the laundry. Until I pass out, that is. I have time to pass out today, right? Ugh, stuffy head, can’t breathe. Do I have a napkin in here somewhere? Can I blow my nose with one hand without running off the road?
~ How many posts do I have in the blog’s queue? I think one posted today and I’ve written most of tomorrow’s — I’ll have to finish that so it can post in the morning. But how am I going to rebound enough to write anything new? This headache is clobbering me left, right, and center; I can hardly see straight enough to drive, let alone write. What do real writers do when they have the flu or whatever? Write from their bed? The bathroom?
~ Ugh.
~ Hey, that’s not too bad a price for regular unleaded, but it’s still a better deal at BJs. When will I have time to get over there for gas, though? Plus BrightSide said I needed to get my oil changed, too. I can probably fit that in on Thursday…
~ Maybe I can fill up with gas after T-man’s tae kwon do lesson. We need dog food, too, and PetSmart is over that way. I could pop in to grab a bag before heading home afterward. But only if BrightSide shows up. Otherwise I’ll have to get the kids home and started on dinner.
~ Dinner. What should we have for dinner?
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Picture this at triple speed, with new ideas bouncing into my head as soon as the last one starts to move out, and you’ve got a hint of why I always ride with the radio on. This kind of free-form brainstorm ricochetting around the car can be pretty distracting.
And that would be your 15-minute(ish) peek into Monday’s drive.
Riddle from the Middle 