It only took me three stops at the grocery store in two days to remember my baby spinach.

*************************

My kid didn’t kill the dog after she ate her entire lunch box so I’m pretty sure we’re in the running for a Nobel Peace Prize now.

*************************

I managed to volunteer 3½ hours at the book fair without telling a single girl she’d be more beautiful without six coats of mascara strangling her lashes.

*************************

I’m on a four day streak of looking like a grown up. In related news, it’s been four days since somebody asked if I feel okay. Concealer works wonders.

*************************

I’ve mastered the art of nonchalance while peeing in a bathroom with 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade girls. Next week I’ll flip to chalance and see how they react.

*************************

My Tuesday went to shit in a spectacular way followed by an all nighter and a touch-and-go Wednesday…but did I run away? Or hide in my closet? No I Did Not. Sometimes hanging in there is the win.

*************************

I managed to walk out of Target with the two items – and only the two items – I went in to buy. True story. I have witnesses.