savage orgies and half naked stars

Granted, mamas often think their kids are a riot, even when they’re definitively not.  But still…there are moments when I just blink at these not-so-small people and think, “Huh?”


Bear:  “That couldn’t have been mom.  She tooted yesterday.”  (I guess you can tell who’s considered least gassy in our house.)


Bear:  (looking at a photo of Whitney Houston in a strapless gown)  “Missing half that dress there, lady?!”  Why yes, Bear.  Yes, she is.


“SAVAGE!”  This year’s word that’s guaranteed to crack up any of the fourteen and under crowd within earshot.  As in, “Savage!” (look at that kid’s bike/skateboard/phone)  “Savage!” (you’re going where on vacation? Cool!)  “Savage!” (you got the top level on ____?! No way!!)  It’s pretty much the go to phrase for, well, everything.

Side note on tween slang: watch your reactions.  The four of us were sitting in the family room watching (please don’t ask me what, I don’t remember and can’t for the life of me imagine what would use the following phrase) tv when the phrase “the orgy was savage” was used.  Both kids busted out laughing and I was all, “okay, sure, die laughing because someone said orgy” to diffuse the situation.  They stared at me blankly for a moment before saying they were laughing about “Savage!” and had no idea what the other word meant.  Crickets.  Moving right along, people, nothing to see here.


“Where’s my (sweet tea, leftovers from La Fiesta, biscuit, piece of pizza)?  What do you mean, you threw it out??  I wanted that!”  (Note that food and beverages sit in the fridge anywhere from four to seven days.)


Parenting.  Gotta love it.

10 thoughts on “savage orgies and half naked stars

  1. Savage post, Laura! That cracked me up! I think Moo would have her very own fridge full of leftovers if we allowed it. Right now there’s some old fries and maybe two swigs of Gatorade saved in there! For later, a day that will never come! lol

    Liked by 1 person

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