watching a dragon swallow the sun

From a father longing to share the eclipse passion with his daughters.

“I am an eclipse chaser.”

I say this as if introducing myself at a 12-step program. Lately, encumbered by parental responsibilities, I do my chasing in an armchair with a star chart, except now I’m preparing once again for physical pursuit.

A total solar eclipse is the most spectacular event in nature, and the one this August 21 will be the first in nearly 40 years to cross the continental United States. Millions will see it and I’m determined to haul my family across the country to be among them.”

Howling At The Moon: Why I’m Taking My Children To See The Solar Eclipse | Cognoscenti

how new math ruined the grocery store

Come on, you know you’ve wondered about some of these.  I’m not losing sleep or anything, but I’ve run a few internal rants about some of these.  Check out Nick’s commentary on grocery stores:

Paper towels that advertise you are buying “Like 8” rolls when you are only purchasing 6 thick rolls –  It’s not “like 8” rolls.  It’s 6 rolls!  Recently, and I swear this is true, I bought a package of 6 paper towel rolls that are usually ”like 8,” but it had a large “BONUS ROLL” label on it because somehow it was “like 9”, when it was still only 6 rolls.  I hate this new math.  If I am going to pay for “Like 8” or “Like 9” paper towel rolls, I think I should be able to pay “Like full price.”

How are 6 paper towels like 9? Things that annoy me in grocery stores – nickclaussen.com

school supply lists are here. joey’s got an Opinion.

And, in honor of the first day of August…

“On Sunday, we got one of those fabulous automated calls of which I’m so incredibly fond.  Sassy’s middle school principal had a seven-point audio presentation for us, and one of those seven points was the supply list.  The supply list.  I fuckin hate the supply list.”

This is way more than your typical school supply list rant.  It is a laugh out loud funny look at our new academic demands, including commentary on elementary socialism and quantity overkill.  Bwahahahaha!

Shady Ass School Supply Lists | joeyfullystated

IKEA, home goods, and whether color matters

“Do you have these cups?  Everyone I know has these cups…I can’t help from paying attention to which color I’m giving to the kids.  I know, I know, I’m not supposed to teach them that color matters, and I’m just supposed to grab the two cups from the top of the pile and put them on the table without thinking about it.  But I don’t. 

Because do you know what happens when I put the pink cup down in front of my son?  A shitstorm of monumental proportions.  And I can try to reason with him and tell him color doesn’t matter, but by this point he’s wailing and past the point of no return and he’d rather die of thirst.”

Should we talk to our kids about race? – Baby Sideburns

kids, technology, and a contract to save your sanity

Yes, we’re midway through summer, but I still think this is a worthwhile read for those of us dealing with kids and technology.

“I felt a wave of sadness.

Because I know that without constant monitoring, unplugging and resisting my kids’ desire for more technology, this could be us. And I’m guessing balance is probably a struggle for most families, too. I know some have simply stopped struggling against it and just given in. I get it.

We are in an unprecedented era of technology that none of us have ever experienced. And we really don’t know the effect it will have on our children.”

Hey Internet- Let’s Have an Honest Talk About Screens This Summer – Kristen Welch

Why? “Because kids lie. All the time.”

That age old question: is it wrong to read my child’s diary?  One woman’s (vehement) opinion. 

“I have been very clear in making sure my children have never even gotten the idea that they have a right to privacy in my home.  Sure, my kids can bathe in private or close the doors to their bedrooms, but they cannot keep diaries locked away or drawers in their dressers off limits from me and the Hubs.

Why do we think that children deserve privacy?  Why do we think that some how we’re betraying our precious snowflake’s trust by reading her text messages or his emails?  I’m not betraying their trust, I’m parenting.”

People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Why My Children Have No Right to Privacy

–  A humor blog about kids and being a mom.  Saying the things people want to say.  People I Want to Punch in the Throat.

who has a “favorite frontiersman” anyway?

Kids’ camps are da bomb.  Really.  Except when they’re not. 

“Dear camp directors,

I’m worried.  Like seriously worried.  I mean you’re supposed to be taking care of my precious kiddos every day, but I’m questioning your sobriety.  Nahhh, not our bus driver.  She rocks the Casbah.  But I’m seriously worried that the people who are in charge at camp are smoking something.

Because I just took a look at the summer calendar and I have four words for you: WTF were you thinking?  Or drinking?  Or inhaling?”

WTF happened to NORMAL dress-up days like crazy sock day?!! – Baby Sideburns